AHHHHHHHH!!!!

Ya'll,

Grab a chair and sit down, because we GOT OUR COURT DATES!!!!!!!!!! We are beyond excited (and a little scared!) to be going to meet OUR BOYS!! We received an e-mail from our director on Thursday afternoon letting us know our court dates are going to be August 25 and August 26!!! As of right now we are planning to leave the weekend of August 15 to make sure we are there a week before our date. This will give us enough time to do a few required things before we meet our sons!!! That's right I said our sons!!! So for those of you who are a little unsure of our process in country here's a quick re-cap:

1) Arrive on August 17: we will plan to stay in the capital city of Kampala for the first few days to see the tombs of the kings, parliament and few other historic landmarks that are required by our judge. We need to document us there with pictures, so we want to get this out of the way ASAP.

2) Travel to Jinja to meet our boys: Our boys are in an orphanage in Jinja which is about a 3 hour drive from Kampala. We will plan to stay at a guest house in Jinja for the first 3-4 weeks until we have the official ruling from our judge

3) August 25: Court for J-man :) Please pray for this...our judge is very erratic and very hard on the adoptive mom (that's me!). From what I've heard he will question the mom for up to 2 hours while asking the adoptive father maybe 1 or 2 questions. I will need peace for this as I'm already a little anxious as to what he will ask. I will be coached by our lawyer in Uganda prior to court, but I will take all the prayers I can get!

4) August 26: Court for L-man :) Pray for this too! Pray that the boys both have peace and will feel comfortable sitting on our laps for most of this time. Additionally, any living relatives of the boys will need to be at their respective court dates. Please pray we can bless them in some way and that we can form a good rapport.

5) Wait... After court we wait for the verbal ruling from our judge. This is typically 1-1.5 weeks. After we get the verbal ruling, then we wait for the written ruling...again another 1-1.5 weeks. We're believing to have both rulings within 2 weeks. During this time we will be going back and forth to the orphanage to spend time with the boys.

6) Move to Kampala: Once we have their written rulings, we will plan to move to a guest house in Kampala. This place is a little nicer (more consistent electricity and a washing machine!) and the house mom Harriet will cook us meals. This is the first time we will have the boys stay overnight with us, so pray for peace for them and that they will feel safe with us.

7) Passports: Once we get their written rulings we can apply for their passports. This process can take anywhere from 5 days to 4+ weeks. Most people expedite this process by paying bribes to the officials. Paul and I will not be doing that, but we ask God's favor over this step so HE will expedite it for us :)

8) IOM (International Organization for Migration): This is the medical exams our boys will need to have prior to leaving the country. They will be tested for Tb and a slew of other illness to ensure they don't need further treatment before entering the United States. After their initial exams we will head back 3 days later for their follow-up. If this is approved then they will send the paperwork over to the embassy for processing (typically 3-5 days).

9) Embassy Part 1: Once the embassy receives the paperwork from IOM we will be contacted for a document check interview. This entails an embassy official going through our paperwork to make sure everything is accounted for, legitimate and filled out properly. Once we pass this we will be contacted for a Visa interview.

10) Embassy Part 2: After the document check we will have a Visa interview. This requires any living relatives to be present again and they will interview Paul and I as well to ensure nothing is fabricated or fraudulent. Once this is complete (and we are approved!) we can pick up their Visas a few days later and head home!

I know this is all making your head spin (mine too!!), but it will all be worth it when our boys are finally home :) We are believing to be there less than 12 weeks, but are planning for the full 3 months to keep our minds right. We know this is going to be a crazy adventure, but we are ready for the challenge and so excited to fulfill this desire we've had for so long. We still have a long road to go in-country and still needs to come up with all the necessary funds, but God is faithful and we know He won't leave us now!

If you would like to support us financially there is still time and every dollar matters! Options include:

1) Tax deductible: http://www.projecthopeful.org/matched-families/stevens-family

2) Paypal: stevens.paul.s@gmail.com - please select friends and family so they don't take a percentage!

3) Buy a t-shirt: $25 each plus shipping...They are pretty fly if I do say so myself :) and comfy!

4) Go Fund Me (details to come): We are planning to do a Go Fund Me account while we are in country to hopefully raise the funds for our plane tickets home. We currently do not have the money in our account to pay for those and are hoping to raise $5,000 to cover some of the costs or at least pay for the boys!

I want to genuinely thank each and every one of you who have reached out during this process and supported us in any way. For those of you close to me, you have seen many tears and frustrations over the last few months, but your support and encouragement has meant the world to me. This period of waiting was very challenging, but God was so faithful to fulfill His promise to us and despite the deep feelings of sorrow, we never lost faith. 

We couldn't do this without each and every one of you, and we are so grateful to call you friends. We hope you continue to follow us on this journey and we can't wait to finally introduce you to our boys in a few short weeks!

Love to you!

J turns 4

Today our oldest son turns 4. My heart is so heavy to think of yet another milestone we are missing, yet at the same time I want to celebrate his life and his future. We are continually humbled by the fact that God chose us to parent these boys, and even with them halfway across the world, we are learning what that looks like on a daily basis. I know God has a perfect plan in all of this, but every time I miss something else I can't help but feel like we're letting them down. We want to be there so bad, but in this season of waiting there is nothing else we can do but pray and trust God. We know we have many years of memories to come, but it doesn't negate the 4 years we've missed. I e-mailed the orphanage director and asked her to give him some extra love from his mom and dad...She said she would as well as some M&Ms, so hopefully he had a great day :) I made a cake for little J and we sang loud enough for him to hopefully hear us! We can't wait to celebrate with both of them soon.

As far as a court update, we are still waiting. At this point we've prepared ourselves to not travel until mid to late August, but would really just like to have a firm date. The courts close this Friday, July 17 and we are believing God to move things forward and let us know our date this week! Our orphanage director is there advocating on our behalf, but all we can do is put our hope in God and trust that He knows better than we do. If I'm being honest I continue to struggle daily. My heart is in Uganda and it's been hard to let go of our thoughts of being home with them at the end of the summer. If we go in August our prayer would be to be home before Thanksgiving. I've realized in all of this that my plans don't really matter, and I've had to learn to be flexible and adaptable. Every day I give our adoption over to God again, and every day I learn to trust His timing and not my own.

Thank you for your continued prayers and support. Your kind words and prayers mean more than you know...and if you're around me on a weekly basis, hugs always help :)

Love to you all,

Still Waiting...

Hi All,

At this time we still have no update or idea of travel time. I have been waiting to post something until we had something more concrete to say, but we just don't.

Last week I received a call (what I thought was the travel call) letting us know that there has been a delay in our court assignment due to the court registrar. From what we understand they usually change registrars in July, however this year it was done early (whether due to the other person being fired or just a change, who knows) and the new registrar has not shown up to work yet (again, whether they had someone lined up or not, we don't know). At this point we are still on standby and just eagerly waiting a new update. Our orphanage director is planning to head back to Uganda early due to the many changes happening at this time, so hopefully that should give us more concrete info and faster.

Needless to say I have been having a very difficulty time. My heart was prepared to leave in August or September and since the timeline has been moved up I let myself get hopeful. This was a bad decision on my part. Over these last 3 weeks my anticipation has grown each day and I have spent many nights curled up in tears. Most of the emotional burden is the unknown and the gripping fear that comes with this process, but a lot of it is the love I'm feeling for my boys and simply not knowing when we'll get to see them. All of our bags are packed, zipped and ready to go, yet we continue to wait. We're feeling like we're in the dark about when we'll actually go, and wondering if it will really happen before the courts close on July 15. At this point the adoption consumes my daily thoughts. It's all I can think about and dream about and getting up and going to work everyday just seems so trivial in comparison. I'm sure many of you may think I'm crazy, and most days I feel that way, but I wanted to give you an honest glimpse into my heart these days. To explain why things have been quiet, and why this adoption waiting thing is so dang hard.

If I’ve learned anything over this year and a half of waiting, it is that God is most certainly with us. He is for us. He is kind and caring and He has not and will not abandon us. Yet, in the midst of the WAITING, I often doubt that truth. When I'm feeling hopeless and lost and like this will never happen, I doubt. I have been spending an hour a day in God's word, reading, praying, worshiping and declaring all the things I want to see, but I'm just feeling so weary. I'm feeling numb to the emotion of it all, yet continuing to somehow push forward. I know that His Word brings strength to every painful situation, and the more time I spend refreshing myself the more grace He gives me. We serve a faithful God and just because I don't SEE things moving doesn't mean He's not working on our behalf. I have been so challenged to trust His timing every step of the way and this is again no exception...but that doesn't mean it isn't hard. Every. Single. Day. My heart is bursting at the seems with love and expectation and it's so hard to wake up everyday just to have another day pass with no movement forward. To wake up everyday with the anticipation that you might meet your kids this week and then another week goes by and still no date in sight. I'm continuing to believe we will travel before the court deadline until it passes. I'm continuing to trust God despite my feelings. I'm continuing to put my hope in Him and not rely on myself. I know things in country will be just as trying and just as emotional but having our boys in our arms will make the journey totally doable.

Please continue to pray for us. We are feeling tired and weary and discouraged, but our God is mighty and we know He will sustain us. We can't thank you all enough for your kind words, support and prayers. We need them more than we can say. We hope to share some good news soon.

We love you,

Go Time?

Dear Friends and Family,

Sorry for the lack of updates, but it's been a little crazy on our end the last few weeks. I am writing because we have some news, but not enough to add exclamation points yet :)

About a week and a half ago we received a call from our orphanage director letting us know that our lawyer in Uganda expects us to travel in the next few weeks(!!!!). As far as we understand, they are hoping to get all of their open cases closed by 4th of July weekend (that's us!!). The tricky part is that in Uganda, the courts close every year from July 15-August 15 for their summer holiday. So with keeping that in mind, we not only have to have our court date before July 15, we have to have our written ruling from the judge (granting us legal guardianship of our boys) by July 15. This is no small task. Typically from court date to ruling is anywhere from 1-3 weeks, so that means if we have a court date in mid-late June we HAVE to have our ruling at a faster pace than expected. Nonetheless, our lawyer is confident this will happen and we are believing that God will move mountains on our behalf. On top of it all, we will need to be in Uganda at least 3 days before our court date in order to 1) meet our boys (can't process this yet), and 2) take a tour of historic landmarks in Uganda (many judges require it at some point, and admire you if it's done before court). With that said, we could have only a 3-4 day notice to travel which has sent us into nesting mode. And quick. We have been slowly packing over the last 3 months, but now that's it's almost go time, it's been insane. There's so much to get done and very little time to do it. Paul and I are still working full time and then staying up until all hours of the night packing, ordering items for our trip, working on the boys room, and making lists upon lists upon lists. Things are coming together slowly but surely, and we are trusting God with the rest.

The last couple weeks have been a lot of hurry up and wait as we fully expected to know our travel date by this time. We are trying to rest in God's timing and just get things done with the extra time we're given. I'll admit I've let myself get a little excited at the prospect of traveling soon, which has not been good for me. I didn't expect for us to travel until August or September and I was peaceful with that knowledge. But now that things are moving faster, I've been feeling the anticipation of {FINALLY} meeting our boys, which is not a place I've let myself go the entire process thus far. The unknown of when we're going to travel and how it will all fit together before July 15 has left me discouraged, frustrated and overwhelmed. I know much of this is coming from a place of sheer exhaustion, but this process is so emotionally draining, and once I got a glimpse of our precious boys in my arms, I was done for. I've spent many nights this week in tears or fighting back tears and despite my best efforts to reel myself back in, I may be too far over the line. This whole process has been a HUGE step of faith and this time of limbo is no exception. We are continuing to trust God in every breath, every word and every thought. We've been fervent in my prayers and we KNOW God has us. Better than that, we know He has our boys and that's been my only source of peace. I've said it before, but I'll say it again, adoption is messy and hard and frustrating, but it's been worth every minute because of the lives of our sweet boys. I know our time in country will be a whole new host of challenges and emotions, but I take courage in that time because we will have our boys with us. They will finally be Stevens and with that in mind, we continue moving forward.

We ask that you please continue to partner with us on this journey. Your support, love, prayers and encouragement is life to us, and we really couldn't do it without you. I know this all seems crazy (sometimes I think we are! ha!), but we know we have been called to adopt and we can't wait to finally be a mom and dad to little J and little L; and finally give them a family. Every child deserves a family and we are SO blessed to be able to be that for these 2 boys. Many of you have been kind with your requests to help us and we SO appreciate it! So much of our to do list has to be done on our end, but below are some ways you can help that are invaluable to our process:

1) Pray for us! 
- Pray we get our court date SOON and that we will receive our written ruling before July 15. 
- Pray our boys will "attach" (that's the adoption terminology) to us quickly; that they will feel safe with us and trust us. 
- Pray for all of our travel details to come together and for us to arrive in Uganda safe and sound WITH all of our luggage :)
- Pray for our peace and emotional health. Lord, do we need it!

2) Consider contributing financially
I know so many of you have poured out your love and your finances to help support our adoption, and we can't tell you in words how much that has meant to us. With that said, we still need roughly $15,000 to complete the adoption process in country and immediately when we arrive home. At this time, we simply don't have it. $6,000 of that will go toward airfare alone, and the rest will be used for lodging, drivers, food, and court/embassy/medical fees for the boys. If you feel led to contribute tax deductible donations can be made through project hopeful at this link:  http://www.projecthopeful.org/matched-families/stevens-family
Other donations can be accepted through checks or Paypal at stevens.paul.s@gmail.com 

3) Hand me down clothes and shoes! 
We are accepting hand me down clothes from little boys everywhere :) Our boys are small but will probably fit into a 4T-5T once they're home and fed and loved :) They guesstimate they wear a size 9-9.5 shoe, but some larger would work too! We have some new clothes from people, but are still in need of pants, shorts, jackets and shoes. Thanks in advance!

We love you all and we can't wait to share our beautiful little ones with all of YOU.

xo,

Updates and Confessions

Hi All,

We can't thank you enough for all your prayers and support. We've had so many sweet gestures of gifts for the boys, financial support and words of encouragement, and I want you all to know that IT DOES NOT GO UNNOTICED! 

A couple weeks ago, Paul and I went home for a "toddler shower" thrown by our family. It was wonderful to celebrate the lives of our boys as well as get some wonderful goodies I know they will love :) It was a beautiful party filled with friends, family and great food! It was nice to just take time to enjoy this time in our lives without feeling the overwhelming stress of it all. A huge thank you to Rachelle Sebastian, Lucy Sebastian, Tiffany Sebastian, Carol Stevens and Dawn Dell for taking the time to shower us!! Below are a few pics for your viewing pleasure :)

Excitingly, we recently received a CD of 280 pictures of our boys! Needless to say we have looked through them countless times, and it has been such a joy to see them grow over the years. We were able to share these pictures with our families while we were home, and it was such an amazing experience to see their excitement :) We are still unable to share their pictures publicly at this time, but we can't wait for all of you to see their sweet faces! They're SO CUTE!

As for an update, we are {supposed} to travel before July 15. In Uganda the courts close every year from July 15-August 15. Our orphanage director has said our lawyer in Uganda is pushing to get all of the open cases completed before they close in July. THAT'S US! If we don't travel before then, we will have to wait until August before we can go before the judge. With all of that said, please continue to pray for us. We NEED them! Pray that our paperwork will be processed quickly by the courts and we will get our court date SOON! Pray we get placed with a good judge who will hear our case soon and we will get our written ruling BEFORE July 15. Pray for this HUGE transition we are about to go through and that God will continue to give us peace. Additionally, we're still anticipating another $12,000 to complete the process, so keep an eye out for our fundraisers coming up! ;) We still have a long road ahead of us, but we are excited for the journey!

On a more serious note, I've been having a really hard time with the wait. I'm sure every adoptive mom has gone through this phase, however I feel like it just continues to intensify. Over the last month I've been trying to keep my anxiousness at bay with preparing the boys room, getting our house ready, making packing lists, making lists for my packing lists, shopping for items we need to take to Uganda, working, making furniture and the list goes on. All the while my heart is longing to be halfway around the world loving on my babies. I've been folding their laundry, organizing their toys, painting their room, building their beds and imagining all the memories we will make once they're home. My heart already loves them unconditionally, and it's been such a privilege to get a small glimpse of God's heart toward us. Mother's day was hard for me. To be honest, I've never thought about what it would be like to be a mom on Mother's day, but this year was so bittersweet. I already feel like a mom in my heart, but to the world I'm not quite there yet. It was difficult to know they are there waiting for us, and we can't (yet) be with them. Every day I wake up with a new excitement and a new hope, believing that we will soon know when we will get to meet them, but we continue to wait. Everyday we pray for them. Everyday we love them more. Everyday is one day closer. But it's still just so hard. I've realized that we can't do this without God. I've had to learn to relinquish my rights, my control, my thoughts and my emotions to Him everyday. I've had to learn to trust Him completely and know that His timing is perfect. But it's still just so hard. I know God is loving, protecting and providing for our babies, and at this time I have to trust that that's enough.

We will keep you posted as we know what are plans are, but please continue to keep us in your prayers!

We Love You,

The Wait

Hi Friends,

So many of you continue to ask for updates of when our boys will be home, and unfortunately we continue to not be able to answer your questions. TRUST ME when I say that we are also eagerly anticipating their arrival, but all we can do is trust God and wait. 

Through this process, I am continually challenged by the amount of patience it takes. I have some days where I feel calm and am able to full rely on God to take care of the details...and then there are days when I feel like I'm going crazy and the day to meet them will never come. I wish I had more details to give, I wish I could tell you all exactly what date we will be leaving, I wish I could tell you their favorite color or food or toy...but I can't...and that's the reality of adoption. We love children we've never met and they've already become an integral part of our family despite living halfway across the world. Every night I look into their room and picture our boys in their beds fast asleep. I dream about all the memories we'll make, the fun we'll have and the craziness that will ensue. I can't wait to hear the pitter patter of their feet in the hallway and the sound of their laugh from their bedroom. 

People continue to tell me how much our lives will change once they're here, and how we should cherish all the time we have just the two of us. I agree and understand where they're coming from, but I honestly can't wait for our lives to change in this way. We've been told countless times how lucky the boys are to have us as parents, but in reality I think Paul and I are the lucky ones. These boys have seen worse things in their 3 years of existence than I have in my whole life. They have struggled and cried with no one to hear them and have never known the love of a mom and dad. When people tell me how much our lives will change, I think about how much our lives will be BLESSED by the addition of these two amazing little boys. I think about how even though our lives will be turned upside down, the thought of being able to take in these two, precious lives and let them love us as much as we love them will be priceless. All of the crying and worry and anxiety and waiting will be completely worth it, because it means these boys will have a family and we will get to be their mom and dad.

So while we continue to wait, we pray for their lives and well-being from across the world. We pray that God will love them, care for them and provide for them even when we can't be there. We pray that their hearts will be ready for a family, and that we will be knit together by love and the sheer grace of God. Adoption is crazy and messy and hard but worth every minute.

Thank you all for your continued love and support. We couldn't do this without you and we can't wait to share all the details as soon as we know them :) We covet your prayers and we look forward to watching God's plan unfold.

With Love,

THANK YOU!

Dear Friends and Family,

We want to say a HUGE THANK YOU to all of you who donated to our March Madness fundraiser! 

We raised $7,200!! Yes, I did just write $7,200!! 

I feel like we've said this a million times before, but words cannot express our true gratitude for the outpouring of love and support that we continue to receive! The financial side of adoption continues to be daunting and overwhelming, but every day we learn how to trust God a little more, and He continues to be so faithful in His provision. 

As of right now we are $500 away from meeting our next deadline, which will be due in the next month. After that we are still estimating another $12,000-$15,000 to complete the process. These later fees include airfare (to and from for us and the boys), Visas (for us and the boys), paperwork fees required by the US Embassy, medical exams, vaccinations, medications (for us and the boys), passports for the boys, lodging, food, and drivers while in Uganda, post-placement reports once we return to the US (done by our social worker who did our home study), and finalizing the adoption of the boys in the US (when they will officially become Stevens!!). So with all of that said, your contributions are not in vain - when we say every dollar counts - we mean it!! We thank God every day that He will multiply these gifts, not only on our behalf, but on YOUR behalf as well. We can't tell you how much your support - whether financial or emotional - means to us. Knowing that so many people are on our side - praying, loving, and giving to us - helps us to keep moving forward and follow this call on our lives.

This journey is challenging us and growing us in new ways every day and all we can do is continue to trust God and know that somehow He will help us accomplish the task of bringing our sweet boys home!

Thank you to all of you who continue to partner with us in this process! We couldn't do it without you!

Love,